Recently I read a blog post by an author who admitted to being secretly jealous of other writers' success. I kind of think this person had a point. In the movie Midnight in Paris, the Ernest Hemingway character says that all writers are competitive. When asked to read the protagonist's WIP, he says, "No. If it's no good I'll hate it. If it's good, I'll hate it even more."
And I knew what he meant. Now, I'm actually a very supportive author. I do my best to help those who've asked me to read their writing, be it a novel, query, article, story, email, grant, whatever. Most of the time I don't notice feeling anything, but occasionally, when I come across something really good, I think, "Gee, why didn't I think of that?" And if I'm not careful, I can start to think, "What if my own writing isn't as good?"
Interestingly, this phenomenon almost never happens when I'm reading the classics. I guess I just expect that Mr Dickens, Mr Forster, Miss Austen, and Sir Arthur are going to be brilliant. (It does irk me that Forster wrote A Room with a View when he was in his 20s and had no right being so insightful or so generous in spirit.) It's when I come across something that an "ordinary" writer like me has produced that I feel my hackles rise ever so slightly.
I do get over it. I don't spend the weekend sobbing in the bathroom; that's just a stupid waste of time. Nor do I allow myself to become paralyzed. Sometimes writer's envy can spur us on to try harder, and that's a good thing. In the end, what sustains a writer is his or her innate sense of self-worth coupled with a strong dose of denial. The odds of success are so slender we have to believe we will overcome them, or else we certainly never will.
And of course, a lot depends on one's definition of success. I have a friend who thinks success only means NYT best seller. In literary fiction. Me, I'm happy writing genre fiction, and I'm thrilled to have a contract with a small press.
So, if you've got author envy, what do you do about it? I'd love to hear. Peace.
And I knew what he meant. Now, I'm actually a very supportive author. I do my best to help those who've asked me to read their writing, be it a novel, query, article, story, email, grant, whatever. Most of the time I don't notice feeling anything, but occasionally, when I come across something really good, I think, "Gee, why didn't I think of that?" And if I'm not careful, I can start to think, "What if my own writing isn't as good?"
Interestingly, this phenomenon almost never happens when I'm reading the classics. I guess I just expect that Mr Dickens, Mr Forster, Miss Austen, and Sir Arthur are going to be brilliant. (It does irk me that Forster wrote A Room with a View when he was in his 20s and had no right being so insightful or so generous in spirit.) It's when I come across something that an "ordinary" writer like me has produced that I feel my hackles rise ever so slightly.
I do get over it. I don't spend the weekend sobbing in the bathroom; that's just a stupid waste of time. Nor do I allow myself to become paralyzed. Sometimes writer's envy can spur us on to try harder, and that's a good thing. In the end, what sustains a writer is his or her innate sense of self-worth coupled with a strong dose of denial. The odds of success are so slender we have to believe we will overcome them, or else we certainly never will.
And of course, a lot depends on one's definition of success. I have a friend who thinks success only means NYT best seller. In literary fiction. Me, I'm happy writing genre fiction, and I'm thrilled to have a contract with a small press.
So, if you've got author envy, what do you do about it? I'd love to hear. Peace.
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